Sen. Mike Lee wants to make it illegal for you to swap nudes with guys across state lines

U.S. Senator Mike Lee speaking with attendees at the 2019 Teen Student Action Summit
Photo: Gage Skidmore – Wikimedia Commons

Sen. Mike Lee of Utah has chosen the hill he would like to die on, and it’s one covered in sweat, sin, and other bodily fluids.

The 51-year-old, who hates LGBTQ people, just proposed two new pieces of legislation. The first bill, which he’s calling the “Shielding Children’s Retinas from Egregious Exposure on the Net (SCREEN)”, would require adult websites to ask users their age before allowing them access to any content.

Related: J.D. Vance wants to outlaw adult entertainment instead of assault weapons and the jokes write themselves

“Given the alarming rate of teenage exposure to pornography, I believe the government must act quickly to enact protections that have a real chance of surviving First Amendment scrutiny. We require age verification at brick-and-mortar shops. Why shouldn’t we require it online?” Lee said in a statement.

Of course, any millennial who grew up cruising on sites like gay.com as a closeted teenager knows how to get around that filter.

Lee’s second piece of legislation, dubbed the “Interstate Obscenity Definition Act”, is even dumber. It aims to effectively make his first piece of legislation moot by banning pornography, er, “sexually explicit content” from the internet entirely.

The bill aims to do so by…

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