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Quotes & Quips
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Compiled By Jack Nichols R-Rated Movies News polls out today show a slight preference for Bush over Gore. I don't put any stock in them, because most of the people thought they were being asked about R-rated movies. Bill Maher—“Politically Incorrect”, October 23 Fey Sports Slogans Don't Fly 'Wave your hankies for the Yankees' never really caught on. Andy Borowitz--“The Mets Win! The Mets Win!”—New York Times, October 28 A Republican Dirty Trickster Bill Federer has added overt gay-bashing to his bag of dirty campaign tricks, which already includes distortion, campaign finance irregularities, questions about personal finances and a charge for common assault. The latest is an intellectually dishonest ad that makes it look as if House Minority Leader Richard A. Gephardt is advocating same sex marriage and gay Boy Scout leaders. The ad shows Mr. Gephardt giving a speech to the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force in which he says that if Democrats take over the House 'this kind of measure' will be passed. The ad then flashes up 'Their agenda' – 'Same Sex marriage' and 'Gay Boy Scout leaders,' while bells toll funereally in the background. Editorial—“Us vs. Them”-- St. Louis Post-Dispatch, October 27 Sports Stars at Sweet Sixteen Three pupils at Sydney's exclusive Trinity Grammar School have been charged with a series of sex assaults against fellow boarders...The boys, all aged 16, would face a total of 14 charges in children's court next month, police said yesterday…They are understood to be at the centre of allegations that a 16-year-old and a 14-year-old at the Anglican school were tied down and molested with a home-made phallic device...The affair involves some of Trinity's brightest young sports stars, according to sources at the school. The Australian, 28th October Are You a Stage Door Johnny? Specifically, Famous Farewells enables fans to select a deceased celebrity to honor and Famous Farewells sends flowers to the famous person's gravesite, along with a card to express the fans' feelings of love, admiration and loss. Fans choose between several beautiful floral arrangements, all moderately priced…Fans simply point-and-click to honor their favorite celebrities and Famous Farewells does all the work: We locate the gravesite, use a trusted florist to ensure delivery of a wonderful floral arrangement, and provide a touching, heartfelt card expressing the tender sentiments of a devoted admirer. Press Release--Famous Farewells: www.famousfarewells.com Halloween is Bittersweet for the Transgendered We joke in the transgendered community that Halloween is the only day of the year when all the trannies come out of the closet…This is the one weekend when even straight boys can wear a skirt. Tom Hinkle—"Why Halloween is Not Enough"-- Brown Daily Herald, October 27 The Source of America's Strength I hope that all Americans will join in recognizing that the diversity of our people is the source of our strength. Our nation's success depends on our ability to value the contributions that every member of our society can make, regardless of any differences in race, religion, ethnic origin, economic background, or sexual orientation. You can be sure that I will continue to support the right of every American to succeed without the burden of prejudice, discrimination, or persecution not only in government, but in all walks of life. Al Gore-- in a press release issued by the Office of the Vice President, May 11, 1999 Is Grace Jones Tiny? (Grace) Jones's woes continued when she arrived in Melbourne and discovered that a bag with all her performance shoes had not arrived in Australia. The bag was labeled Grace Jones and didn't leave the United States. Jones summoned Pickvance to her hotel room to discuss her missing shoes. "Grace isn't the tallest person and she relies on her shoes to give her height when she performs," Pickvance said. James McKenzie—“Grace Jones saga continues”-- Melbourne Star Observer, October 26 Gay Hindu Priest's Wife Loved Him Truly Anjana Joshi, wife of the Hindu priest stabbed to death in Leicester, said last night that she knew of his secret double life in the city's homosexual community but it made no difference to their marriage. Harish Purohit, 42, president of the Hindu Federation, was known to have had a number of homosexual friends and to socialize in gay clubs around the city. Describing her husband as “one in a million”, Mrs Joshi, 40, appealed for help in catching his killers, who she said had left a void in her life that could never be filled. “Of course I knew about it (his gay links),” she said. “But I respected his wishes and he was always a loving husband. Oliver Wright—“Priest's wife knew about his gay visits”London Times, 24 October Ellen's Met a Hot One Betty DeGeneres is glad her daughter, Ellen, is no longer alone after her high-profile breakup with girlfriend Anne Heche. Betty told The Post yesterday that the 42-year-old comedian is cozying up with ragingly hot brunette actress Alexandra Hedison. Hallie Levine—"Mom Shares Ellen's Joy"--New York Post, October 24 |