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"George W. Bush is the 43rd President of the United States. He was sworn into office by the Rehnquist Supreme Court on January 20, 2001, after a campaign in which he unveiled inspiringly unspecific plans to never ejaculate in the Oval Office, transform America's public schools into Protestant madrassas, bestow the budget surplus on our patriotic defense contractors, transform Social Security and Medicare into vague memories, and systematically shatter the wall separating church and state. "President Bush served for six years as the 46th Governor of the State of Texas, where he earned a reputation as a man of unbeatable name recognition with a massive campaign war chest. There, he shaped policy based on the principles of big-balled rodeo justice, eminent domain, petrochemical exhaust rights, and bountiful lethal injections. " GeorgeWBush.org also provides the texts of many of George W. Bush's most memorable wanna-be speeches such as his address to the National Religious Broadcasters Association wherein, in his opening remarks, he clarifies the bent of what some are pleased to call his mind: "Good afternoon. Thank you, thank you. It's a great pleasure to be back here at the National Religious Broadcasters Association. I want to thank Mrs. Schlafly for that kind introduction, and for sharing her interesting suggestion to exterminate Islam using a weaponized lesbianism vapor. Well I don't care what people say, for a crabby old lizard-broad, Phyllis isn't nearly so stupid as she is just dementia-addled." Further, George W. Bush's campaign web site is unique in that it provides unimagined insights into goings-on at the Bush White House. It links, for example, to an amazingly astute series of recollections written by Virginia Wade, a woman who is desperately in love with Karl Rove, Bush's right-hand man. If Bush wins in 2004, it is believed that Karl Rove will possibly be chosen in that year as People magazine's "sexiest man alive". On Virginia Wade'sweb site http://www.ilovekarlrove.com we hear-tell of Bush, Rove's boss: "I know I shouldn't say this, because Rovey likes him and all, but Rovey's boss just drives me so crazy sometimes! It's like he's always trying to get between us, and doesn't care that while yes, Rovey loves his job, sometimes he just needs a little private time with his Babykins. We'll be in the middle of a private moment - maybe sneaking a smooch on the portico, and his boss will just come butting in with "Oh my God, I totally have this meeting with the Fed Chair in twenty minutes, and, like, I can't even balance my checkbook. Could you explain it to me, Karl?" or "You SO have to come and see the SIZE of this dump that Barney took in the Rose Garden!" or something like that, and because he's his boss, Rovey just has to smile and act nice and do what he says."
Finally, GeorgeWBush.org focuses as well on Mrs. Bush, the lovely wanna-be First Lady. Of her, it says: "Laura Welch Bush has absolutely no intention of ever running for political office. She has never and will never express opinions that are political in nature. She will never traitorously disparage Tammy Wynette and/or the all-American art of baking cookies. She will never be so presumptuous as to think that she should ever go poking her nipples into official White House business. She knows her only involvement in healthcare should be keeping the First Hoo-Hoo clean and ready for service. She will never write a book called Living History. She is not a lesbian." |
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Parody photo from the Web site 
Dick Cheney from GeorgeWBush.org